My parents have been married for fifty-two years and my husband’s parents have been married almost sixty years. God blessed my husband and I with Godly parents who were meticulously involved in our lives. Their love for each other and their commitment to their marriage through the ups and downs of life was a pattern for us to follow. As I was growing up, I took for granted that everyone came from the kind of home that exemplified that kind of love. They love being married and truly understand and fulfill their roles. They are a team in every sense of the word. Often, children that come from wonderful homes and training struggle horribly in their own homes. A healthy home is not guaranteed to transfer from one generation to another. Just as your parents cannot get saved for you, neither can they somehow magically make your home a Christ-centered, loving home or cause their children to have a good marriage. It takes WORK!! I believe with all my heart that Satan hates marriage because it is a beautiful picture of Christ and His church!! His desire is to deceive children who have been reared in a good home to believe that they are entitled to enjoy that same marital happiness that was experienced by their parents with little or no effort on their part. He also would like those whose upbringing was not favorable to believe that a happy marriage is not possible for them. They are “doomed” to the same misery they saw in their parents’ relationship. I remember like it was yesterday a friend in college talking to me about her parents and dating. She said, “I believe my parents love each other but they do not like each other! They said they were attracted to each other in college and that was the extent of their marriage relationship. They disagree and argue about everything!” It was my first time to try to analyze and process her statements and feelings. After that conversation, I decided that I wanted to LIKE my future spouse in addition to loving him. Of course, I love him, but I truly like him and enjoy his company as well. By the grace of God and Him alone, my husband and I have been married twenty-seven years. I LOVE being married to my very best friend! 

We are a team! Our entire family follows a variety of sports, and team sports are our favorite. I have spent many hours following my husband and our three sons and their involvement in high school basketball. My husband is the captain of our team, and I strive to play my God-given role by submitting to his leadership. Ephesians 5:24 tells us, “Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” I certainly don’t have all the answers, and I am always trying to watch and learn from others who have good marriages. The following are a few ideas that have helped me try to be what I need to be in our home.

Together – The two of us are one flesh. If my spouse wins, so do I. If my                     spouse loses, I do too!

Ecclesiastes 4:9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.

Energy – A good marriage takes work—God’s work in us, AND our willingness to work. 

Ephesians 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

Assist – My goal is to complete my husband and help him in the work God has called him to do.

Ephesians 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

Mission – Striving for common cause draws us closer to each other. 

Philippians 1:27 “…striving together for the faith of the gospel;”